Saturday 23 March 2013

Alderney



Have you ever been to Alderney? Where? Alderney - it's one of the Channel Islands, smaller than Jersey or Guernsey, but quite beautiful in its lack of commercialisation and tranquility. In fact if you choose to holiday there and are unfortunate with the weather, there really is very little to do except drink. Alcohol remains duty free and plentiful. It is a small island measuring approximately 3 miles X 1 mile in total area. I am not sure of the actual mileage of roads covering the island, but I do know that there is a more relaxed approach to vehicle maintenance with string being a common accessory to many vehicles and many cars and trucks being held together with little more than string, rust and bungee straps.

Getting to Alderney itself is rather an exciting adventure. There are very few direct flights with most flights coming via Guernsey. To fly in from the UK you generally have to fly from Gatwick to Guernsey and then board a little tiny Tri-lander airplane and finish the journey to Alderney. How many of you I wonder have flown in a Tri-lander aircraft? It's very cosy, just two seats wide and when I say 'seats' what I actually mean is seats as in bench (think bus) seats. You can always spot a Tri-lander virgin at the airport and it never fails to amuse me to suggest they ask for a window seat. I think you may still be able to fly direct to Alderney from Southampton and up until a few years ago you could also fly from Shoreham near Brighton. The first time I flew on a Tri-lander I was quite shocked. We loaded onto the very cramped little plane with its three engines, one on each wing and one on top of the plane. I was sat next to the door which had a lot of gaffer tape on it and was secured shut with a bungee cord. There was a gap all around the door, and it was raining and by the time we landed in Alderney I was quite soaked through.

It's an interesting landing on Alderney too, and depending on which way the wind is blowing dictates whether you land on the one tiny strip of tarmac or on the grass. Either way it's a testament to the skill of the pilot that you land at all! The airport is really just a glorified shed but the welcome is warm and the baggage area is amusing as you watch the tiny little plane that has miraculously stayed airborne and juddered its way at around 1500 ft across the channel to this glorious little emerald jewel of an island, disgorge your luggage which is then wheeled over to the chute and in a rather hasty and chaotic manner shoved through the tough plastic curtains at such a speed that trying to pick up your bag or case is something of a challenge. If you come away unbruised then you have done well.

I am extremely fond of Alderney and have had many adventures there. I have seen Puffins on Berhou, seals swimming in the waters, explored the German defences which are dominant on the island (Alderney was occupied during WW 2) The beaches are amazing and pristine and on a warm day rival any beach anywhere. The water is crystal clear, the rock pools plentiful, the ice cream is divine! I will tell you more of Alderney in time, for now, I merely wanted to introduce you to it.

Welcome to Alderney where the pace of life is one that we should all be able to live at.

Monday 18 March 2013

First Post

So this is my first post and I have absolutely no idea what the hell I am doing! I appear t have managed to create two identical blogspots and have no idea how to remove the one I do not want. I guess I need a small person to show me how to make it work.

My name is Woozle. Obviously that's not my real name, but for now, until I trust whoever has the misfortune to stumble across this rambling diatribe such as it is, Woozle is all you're getting. I'm not sure quite how this is going to work, but I do have so many stories to tell that it seems a shame to keep them all to myself and not to share them out with other people. If I raise a smile on just one face then my work here is valid. I love to laugh myself and I love to ear others laugh as well.

So if you're a little off the wall and ready for a bit of a leap of faith, then take my hand, close your eyes and jump and join me for the journey through the chaotic and more bizarre adventures of my life.